Desultory

sarkastickunt:

My 16 year old daughter had to have a simple surgery today, and what was supposed to be a routine ambulatory procedure turned into a moment of absolute white knuckled panic.

She’s never had any surgery. Nothing more invasive then a cavity filled. She’s never had blood drawn, or an IV. She was nervous. She was angsty. And I reassured her over and over that she was being silly, and making a bigger production out of it then needed be and anything else I could say or do to downplay her fear.

She walked to the OR without me. I kissed her goodbye, and told her I loved her and would see her when she got out.

And then her 15 min surgery turned into an hour and 10 min.

The 4 centimeter incision they were supposed to make turned into a 12 centimeter one. Her cyst was excised and will be biopsied. And she received 18 stitches.

While in recovery, her oxygen levels went from 97 to 76. She was gray. She was unresponsive. She looked horrible. And it was then…in that 12 minutes it took for the nurse and anesthesiologist to rush to her bedside and figure out what was wrong, that I lost my mind.

I think I went deaf. I couldn’t hear anything. Everyone sounded like flapping bird wings. My face got hot. My heart started to race and for 720 seconds, I don’t think I made one sound, or moved one inch.

She is fine now. Just a reaction to the anesthesia. But the idea that a simple operation could spiral so out of control makes me realize how fragile life is. We are all barely holding on and at any moment we could lose everything that means anything to us. And even though I’m sure she’s sick of me, I haven’t stopped kissing her face since.

I’m so so glad she’s okay.

yowhatsthehaps:

Today was supposed to be the start of something big. I’m starting to think about my future and what that means and where I want it to go and what I want it to be like.

But then I sat down and started to do it. I quickly realized that I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know where to look.

This is really hard, you guys. The answers were supposed to fall out of the skies and land at my feet. I was supposed to pick them up and put them in a little basket and skip away, feeling great. This did not happen. Not yet, anyways. So here I am, in my button up shirt, trying my best to look like I know what I’m doing, but feeling stupid and overwhelmed and about to cry.

I hope I get better at this. SOON.

I’ll hold your hand. You’re a super awesome grown up, because what they don’t tell you is that 90% of being a grown up is trying to look like you know what you’re doing while secretly feeling stupid, overwhelmed and about to cry.  The other 10% is getting it right and having a bank account.  Someday you’ll have your basket.

So I am up insanely early for me, because I am going to the museum with K, and our munchkins.  I feel like I’m somewhere between no sleep and I think I had a nap.  But today will rock, that is all.

So I know it’s close together, but this didn’t really fit in with the tone of the last post.

K went out with someone we’ll call C.Y.P. because names are unimportant anyways.  What’s important that at least currently K is happy.  There are too few genuinely good, kind, pretty, happy people in this world.  K is one of those people.  So I’m glad that she spent sometime with someone who makes her smile. She’s witty, and smart, and virtually a college graduate (this will still be true after she receives her diploma hahaha), she’s a great person to talk to, and no matter how upset you are, she can quickly turn things around and make everything seem nice and bright.  If she does this on purpose or it’s just somehow ingrained in her I don’t know, but it’s wonderful.

Recently someone hurt K, and I wanted to seriously damage that person, I felt helpless, because I couldn’t fix things for her.  Things are better now, and she is around someone better.  I’m so happy that she found someone to make her smile.  I think you can almost get the importance of that to me, that involuntary smile, that comes from being really happy.  C.Y.P. did that so much so, that not only was it in her voice most likely, you could feel it in her tweets. :)

I heart you K!

Note: There will be posts dedicated solely to T, O and @poeticvenom soon, this is a no particular order kinda thing, because I love them all roughly the same.

I’m not a bad person, I try not to offend or upset people as a general rule.  I generally keep quiet about a lot of things I find offensive, because of freedom of speech and all that jazz.  When I do say something I only say it once, I don’t argue unless I married you or your one of my few close friends (T, K and O).  I walk the fuck away because I don’t want to deal with your shit.  I have my own issues, so if I didn’t marry you, or you aren’t TKO then I just don’t care enough about you.

Perhaps I am giving this to much attention, perhaps I am overreacting.  I’m just saying I don’t want to deal.  Yes this bothered me, but I’ll wake up tomorrow morning and I won’t care, partially because I wrote this tonight, while I was in the moment and all upset, but mainly because you just weren’t worth it.

You said to get over it, then your trashy friend attacks me, the foolish girl, whose secrets I know to many of.  I’m getting over it, and look it doesn’t even require alcohol. Everyone knows the good stuff requires alcohol.  So goodbye, goodnight, I wish you no ill, just stay away.

beaubock:

A couple days ago a friend sent me a DM alerting me that he had spotted one of my tweets in someone else’s feed, unattributed.  Now I’m not so narcissistic as to get that upset about someone stealing one of my tweets, but the more I thought about it, the more the principle of the matter really got under my skin.

The user is @ZachIsHere.  Looking a little further into his feed, I started to notice several other tweets that didn’t really match up with his general style of posting, and, a few of them I recognized as tweets I had read from other users.  And after a little creative Googling I was able to find numerous instances that he has plagiarized other people’s work.

It’s one thing to inadvertently post an amalgam of words and ideas on Twitter that have been shared by other users.  Any one of us has done it, and with millions and millions of logical 140-character combinations out there, surely there’s bound to be some concurrence of thought and humor once in a while.  But it’s quite another matter to knowingly and intentionally re-post someone else’s tweet as your own.  Not cool.

I sent @ZachIsHere an @reply informing him that this behavior violates the Twitter Terms of Service and asked him, politely, to take the tweets down.  He refused, and went so far as to block me altogether.

So because I’m not the type of guy to keep my mouth shut, I’m posting this here to call him out publicly.  Plagiarism is douchey.  Refusing to stop and subsequently blocking the guy who asked you to stop is even douchier.

If you feel so inclined, re-blog this and send @ZachIsHere an @reply with your thoughts on the matter.

Below are some of the instances of his plagiarism that I was readily able to find:

This is just bullshit, I mean I’ve done the similar tweet, but if it’s too similar I remove mine and retweet theirs, But to blatantly steal someone else’s tweets is just sad :(

If barbie were a real girl what size do you think she would be? Small? Extra Small? I’m personally a large. On one hand I’m kinda unhappy about it. I used to be a medium, and my stomach was all smooth and flat and I liked it that way. But I like being a large. I know I’m not fat, but I’m not skinny anymore. Other than my stomach, I’m soft in all the right places, and I love the way my clothes fit, and I’m totally comfortable in my own skin. I love eating whatever I want, doing that made me realized I love the healthy stuff. I have a husband who loves me, and still makes me feel a strange combination of cute/beautiful/sexy. I feel more sure of myself now than I did as a smaller size. I think if Barbie were real she’d be catty and insecure. She’d be on a diet all the time, which would make her bitchy. She’d worry about her clothes and hair, hair that’d be falling out due to anorexia. Barbie would be the friend I worry about. I kinda don’t like Barbie as a real girl. But I secretly I want a new Barbie doll.

I watch a lot of television. Most of it is some sort of crime show. Cold Case, Murder She Wrote, Law & Order S.V.U., Criminal Minds, they all enthrall me. I used to watch C.S.I., but I’ve lost interest in it. I’m also probably the biggest scaredy cat you will ever meet. I don’t like people, doors always locked, and I have cell just so I can safely walk around my town by myself. I don’t watch horror movies because there are crazies out there that will do that to you. That terrifies me, that there’s somoeone out there that thought it up in the first place. Yet I watch Criminal Minds, which deals with serial killers on a weekly basis, and I’m strangely okay with that. I’m watching it right now, a rerun, I’m calm, & it doesn’t bother me, but it doesn’t make me any less afraid. I wish I could be desensitized, less afraid. There are horror movies I’d love to see. There are a few that I have that didn’t bother me, others that shouldn’t have phased me horrified me. I’m working on it, though.

I’m spending my Saturday night, or Sunday morning if you will, watching Murder She Wrote. I haven’t seen this show in years. Not since early high school at least. There’s a lot tangled up with this show for me. It was always a comfort to see Jessica Fletcher sticking her nose into murder after murder. Watching this show is like seeing an old friend, one who is well loved, but you drifted apart from and forgot about for awhile. It’s so wonderful to spend my nights reconnecting

There are some movies that are, and rightfully so, instant cult classics. Interview with the Vampire, Dracula, Nosferatu, and many many others. There’s just something there, that makes them awesome. Something that makes you want to watch them again and again. Then there are movies that take an entire genre and in trying to tone it down, make it suck, or actually not suck that is. They take the cruelest, strongest, most enticing creatures and make them “Fab-u-lous!” I have a problem with that. You stick with your wussy none sucking sparkly happy whatever dudes and give me an old fashioned hold me down and tear my throat out kinda guy. Not that it’s a bad movie, it just doesn’t belong in that genre.

yowhatsthehaps:

I would like to write a strongly worded letter about the cleaning staff at the office, because I am not pleased with them. But I can’t figure out how to make “BUT THEY BROKE THE ARM OFF MY PAPERCRAFT EDGAR ALLAN POE LIKE THREE TIMES THIS MONTH” sound like a legit complaint.

Man, you think YOU’VE got problems…

You could say that they mistreated and damaged the art that you keep on your desk as a decoration. Because even Papercraft is art, especially Edgar Allan Poe Papercraft.

I’m watching what has become one of my very favorite movies, curled up on the couch with my husband (known as poeticvenom on twitter, and will be known as that from here on out) feeling like it has just been a very long day, and as the killers would say “my stomach is sick”. I’m not really sure why, maybe it’s just winter getting to me. I’ve been trying to keep my thoughts light and think of things like shopping and spring. It’s just not working.

I love the chipmunks. They remind me of when I was little, and everyone I knew said I was like Janette. I also really like Valentines day, I didn’t used to. It wasn’t that I thought that it was commercialized or anything, and I didn’t hate it, I was merely apathetic about it. I think I kinda grew into it, it’s a nice feeling to be thinking about love when it’s cold and blustery outside. I like the colors reds and pinks. Of course it helps that I’m married now, to someone who is probably the sweetest most wonderful person there could ever be. To be honest yes he has his jerk moments, but the rest of the time makes all those worth it. Though I don’t think that’s the only reason, I’m sure that’s part of it. I’m the type of person who loves different seasons and the feelings they bring, so I guess it’s only fitting that I would eventually fall in love with Valentines day, although my favorite will ALWAYS be Sweetest day in the Fall. So I found the Simon to my Janette, and I love celebrating things